Sometime in the distant past, roundabouts February or something, there was an AC player gathering at that citadel to the fall of western civilization, the Mall of America.  This haven of evil (except for Electronics Boutique, which is almost worth the nausea I suffer every time I approach the Mallo’s infinite Escher-esque parking ramps) is some ten minutes or so from my house.  I didn’t go.

This did not dissuade dozens of oddball requests that I attend the Boston player’s gathering last month.  I don’t like to leave my house to get things like food and light bulbs.  Why would I want to go to Boston, a city I find essentially uninteresting to begin with, to hang out in a hotel with a bunch of people with whom I would probably start a fight?  I understand everything went smoothly, which disappointed me a bit, and someone managed to get a kiss from Kat.  However, all of this fantastic news paled before the proliferation of t-shirts advertising the site, which is probably about as much advertising as I would ever go for.



The super-block lettered design was by Brimstone, master of marketing and promotion, from an ancient quote from the C. Dalton Zone.  This guy is hysterical.  I sat in his car once and watched him get the attention of some anonymous rollerbladers on the second floor of a hotel so he could give them the URL for his site.  When people ask me if I have a site, I mumble something noncommital and run away.  Probably explains my hit counter.  The pic above is of a bunch of d00dz at the offices of some game company or another, who managed to extort Zaketh and company into sending them some free merchandise.  Game design isn’t just for the chicks you get, you know.

The design is nice, but can it compare to the original design, modeled here by its creator, J., at the last E3 show?  This fine piece of casualwear was made using a white cotton t-shirt, some black fabric paint, and a screwdriver.  A screwdriver is not the finest of illustration tools, and the process involved glopping paint down on the shirt, and kinda smearing it around with the screwdriver to form crude letters.  This design has a few advantages to it, most notably that it has no URL on it, and no explanation or possible hint to an explanation for the quote, and it looks like it was drawn with a screwdriver by a crazy person.  According to Lum, it was "very stalkerish".  I like the idea that a piece of clothing inspired by this site would serve no purpose but to make other people uncomfortable.  I thought of some other interesting catch-phrases to advertise the site on the more corporate-looking shirt… "Go to or we will kill your firstborn"… "Hot Teen Sluts On Camera for the FIRST TIME at"… "GOTM R.I.P,"… "All the latest hacks and cheats for UO, AC and EQ at"…


Enough jerking off over the fact that more than one person thought that making a Mu t-shirt was a good idea… this is a page about gaming right?  About time I published some useful information for people to check out.  Sometimes it seems that pointing out the helpless retards of the gaming world only serves to bring out even more of them, each eager to prove his foolishness in a public forum by accusing other of being rap-listening punks when his own handle is "Immortal Thug".  Let him make "I’m tough because I was in prison and you ain’t" t-shirts if he wants publicity.  Here, fresh from weeks of play and refinement, is the first of my useful and helpful tactical hints!

I have also been screwing around with an audio format.  Select from the following menu for the MP3 format audio version (I hate RealAudio).  Requires that you have Windows Media Player, Winamp, that evil evil Napster, or any one of the millions of MP3 players.


Character Design
Character Development
Levelling Sans Twinking
Allegiance Management



Here is a typical night operation.  The team consists of Igor and Stupidog on point, Cougar and Ivan on the back machinegun line, and Iggy standing by with a rocket rifle for precision killing and a light mortar.  Stupidog and Igor are stealth specialists, who would normally be in full camouflage, moving in a stealth crouch.  They avoid firing if possible, so they don’t give away their position by muzzle flash, and to save action points for any potential interrupts on the enemy’s turn.  In the depicted scene, Igor’s advance has turned up an enemy at the edge of his UV goggle visual range, and the team has gotten the initiative.  From here the machinegunners with the H&K 21’s can saturate the enemy position with fire, taking him out and possibly wounding others in the vicinity but out of detection range.  If this fails, Iggy can try for a shot with HEAP minirockets; the forward observers can sharpshoot with FN FAL/Steyr AUG  in extremis, although they’re really better off hiding and waiting for opportunity fire.  If snipers are present with an M24 or Dragunov, you can most effectively position them behind the machinegunners where they can fire past them before wasting ammunition on burst fire, and also provide moderate rear cover against submachinegunner ambushers.

And if you can’t seem to drag the last few enemies out of their suspected locations, there’s always mustard gas.




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